Honestly
by Anna Fugazzi
Summary: Written for the challenge 'A prophet did once say that honesty's a lonely word.' Draco knows that discretion is the better part of valour.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** This is **slash**, PG-13 or possibly higher for innuendo.

**This story was the result of a two-part challenge, and has two chapters. Please read the warning re. chapter 2.**

Chapter 1 is a response to the first half of the first challenge of hpobstruction, a challenge community on livejournal. The prompt was "_A prophet did once say that honesty's a lonely word_," and we were told to "use the quote within the story or write from the idea/feeling of it".

It is, IMHO, readable. Actually, I kinda like it :)

**However, the second chapter,** which is basically the same as the first, a little bit louder and a little bit worse, **is not good. Trust me on this.** It does not continue the action, it does not add to the plot, it just retells the same story with a few tweaks.

There is _no reason to read it_ other than idle curiosity. If you read it and are disappointed because it was boring and badly written, I will point and laugh at you.

... OK, maybe I won't point and laugh, but I'll definitely roll my eyes and snicker behind my hand.

Thanks to oldenough and chibitoaster for spot-beta!

**A prophet did once say that honesty's a lonely word**

"Oh my god you're home," said Draco, absolutely horrified.

Harry blinked. "All right, that's not exactly the welcome I was hoping for," he said slowly, hanging up his cloak and walking into the living room. "Not that I expected 'Darling, I missed you so much,' but..."

"When are you leaving?"

"Erm. I just got here," he said, dropping onto the couch next to Draco and pulling him into an embrace. "Are you... not happy to see me?" he asked, his words muffled by Draco's hair.

"Are you daft? Do I look happy?" Draco said, giving him only the briefest of hugs before pulling away and standing up agitatedly.

Harry frowned. "Erm... Draco, I've been away for two weeks-" he began, and Draco put out an impatient hand to stop him.

"Wait, stop, let me - don't say anything."

"What? Why not?"

"Because I have to answer anything you ask and-"

"What? Why-"

"-because I can't _not_ answer and - bloody hell. Just shut up! Don't ask me anything! Don't. Say. Anything!"

Harry blinked up at him, rather lost.

"Right." Deep breath. "There was an accident at the Institute today."

"Oh my god. Wha-"

"Sh! We were working on improving potency in Veritaserum."

"Oh."

"And Genevieve pulled a Longbottom. Well - not quite, she didn't make her cauldron explode, but her potion started to boil over and became rather more airborne than it was supposed to be. We were all choking on the stuff for about ten minutes before Madam Perkins managed to get rid of the fumes. So I won't be able to stop myself from answering or even commenting on anything, for who knows how long."

"Is that why you're home early?"

"The whole building was evacuated. You wouldn't believe the mess."

"Why, what happened?"

"First off Floria told Genevieve that she was a brain-dead cow, then Genevieve called Floria an uptight, hysterical bitch, and John agreed-"

"I thought John and Floria were dating?"

"_Were_, yes. Floria telling us all that John's got a bit of a prematurity problem might have put a stake through that. Then the Institute Head came in, Madam Perkins asked him to bugger off and told him he was an interfering dolt and ugly to boot, but by then of course he'd been affected by the fumes too, so he told Perkins that the only reason he didn't fire her was that she had nice tits - I believe he called them 'bouncy' before he ran off looking mortified - and then Perkins informed Genevieve that she'd as much chance of earning her Master's grade in Potions as You-Know-Who had of being sorted into Hufflepuff, which is sadly very true, and then there were fights breaking out all over the entire building, the Laboratories were a mess, one of the Apothecary apprentices hexed the Alchemy Master's nostrils closed, the bloody Aurors were called in, I've no idea how they're going to deal with the Muggles around the building - I believe there's some sort of beauty parlour next door to us, I can only imagine what happened in there - and everybody was sent home."

Harry was laughing helplessly, and Draco scowled at him.

"This isn't funny. I didn't think you'd be here. I thought you were coming home tomorrow."

"I finished early," Harry said, trying to look sympathetic. "So what do you want me to do? Keep quiet?"

"No! Just go away!"

"But... but you know I'm supposed to go training in Aberdeen two days from now. And then I won't be home for another two weeks," Harry said, a little plaintively.

"I don't care! Get out! Go stay at Weasley's!"

"You can't mean that!"

"I can't lie, remember? I mean it. I want you to go away and not come back until I send you an owl saying it's all right."

"Draco, don't be daft. What are you worried about, anyway? You don't lie to me."

Draco's mouth dropped open. "Ex_cu_se me?"

Harry chuckled at the astonished disbelief on Draco's face. "Only you would take that as an insult."

"Harry, what colour are all of my ties?"

"Green or silver or both."

"Does that mean anything to you? No, of course not, brains have never been your forte - oh god."

Harry's eyes narrowed slightly, but he smirked at Draco's dismayed expression and Draco couldn't decide what pissed him off the most: the fact that he'd just blurted something rather tactless, the fact that he was embarrassed by what he'd said, or the fact that Harry seemed to be finding his chagrin highly amusing. "Don't worry about it," Harry said easily. "I know you're smarter than me, and I know you think you're even smarter than you are." And the bastard had the gall to laugh at Draco's indignation.

"Harry, get out. I don't want you here."

"You're being ridiculous."

"I am not! You're being even thicker than usual!"

"I'm used to you being a rude git. If I let my feelings get hurt over everything you say, we would've ended this a very long time ago."

"Yes, but the difference is, I can't stop myself from saying _anything_ right now! And you're being abnormally thick-headed and that's a recipe for disaster."

"Then let's both just not talk until it wears off."

"No. Please, just get out. Go to Weasley's."

"You can't really mean that-"

"Oh for Merlin's - I can't lie, you nitwit! I can't! So if I tell you I want you to leave, you have to believe me! Bloody hell, you're usually so gullible it's painful, but now that I'm under ultra-Veritaserum you decide to not take me at my word."

"I'm not gullible!"

"I could tell you I want a pet Hippogriff for Christmas and you'd believe me. You're so easy to manipulate or dupe that most of the time it's not even worth the effort."

"Why, do you lie to me a lot?"

"All the time," Draco said promptly. Harry's eyebrows shot up. "Everybody does!"

"I don't lie to you!"

"I'm not talking about huge lies, having affairs or selling you out to the Death Eaters, I'm talking about small lies that we all say, all the time, to the people around us to make it easier to get along with them. Yes, that's a lovely tie, no, I prefer my dinner burned to a crisp, yes, I read that novel you recommended and it was fabulous. It's basic courtesy."

"Since when have you ever been courteous?"

"I am, and so are you. Don't tell me you're actually interested in all of Weasley's chess stories, and Granger's dissertations on 1001 uses for fairy tears."

Harry looked sheepish.

"Because you're not. But part of how you stay friends with them - god only knows why you'd want to - is that you don't tell them so."

"Look, I don't want to keep arguing about this. But I don't want to go away, either. I've only got two days home before I'm off to bloody Aberdeen; I want to spend them with you."

"Harry-"

"Why don't I just do a silence spell?"

"We tried that at the Institute. Didn't work at all."

"So I'll do it on myself. So that I can't ask you anything."

"Harry-"

"Please," Harry said softly, and Draco felt his resolve falter.

Damn. It had been a long two weeks. And it was going to be longer before Harry came back. He'd been looking forward to having Harry home; while he had enjoyed the orderly peacefulness of their flat without Harry's things piled everywhere and without his friends traipsing in and out, life was simply better when Harry was home. To talk with, to spend time with, to go to bed with...

"Draco?"

No, no no no. Not the big green eyes thing.

"It'll be all right. Let me just do the spell," Harry said, his voice dropping low, the way he knew always got to Draco.

Draco let out his breath and nodded, feeling like ten different kinds of idiot. This was not a good idea. But the idea of missing what little time they had together...

Harry came closer and kissed him, and Draco revised his opinion of his decision upwards. Ah, yes. He'd almost forgotten. Harry in their flat also meant sex. A lot of sex, usually. The "no talking" thing could make things interesting there, too.

He smiled as Harry's pulse quickened and his hands slid into Draco's hair, and then their tongues and lips were caressing each other. He pulled Harry closer, a delicious warmth starting to spread through him as he felt Harry's excitement rise, and his own pulse starting to speed up as he started to pull Harry into the bedroom-

"Oh." Harry stopped in midstep, and drew back slightly.

"What?"

"Ah. Erm." Harry cleared his throat, suddenly uneasy. "Listen, I didn't know this was going to happen, right? You're not usually home from the Institute until six at least. So, er... I haven't seen Ron or Hermione in a while, and-"

"Weren't you travelling with them?"

"We, erm... got separated."

"What? When?"

Harry hesitated. "About a day or so after I left."

"You said you were travelling with them! You mean you've been on your own? For two weeks? Hunting down bloody Horcruxes with no back-up-"

"I was perfectly safe! Only Ron injured himself, so we thought-"

"Injured how?"

"Erm... nothing serious..." Harry blanched a little at Draco's scowl. "All right, it was a banshee. But he was fine-"

"Oh, marvellous. That's supposed to make me feel better. Bad enough you're out there being a typical Gryffindor brainless oaf, blundering about among Death Eaters and banshees and god only knows what-"

"I was perfectly safe!"

"You were _by yourself_! You _said_ you were going to be with Granger and Weasley! What's the bloody use of having them around if they're going to just flit off the moment there's a spot of danger-"

"Listen, that banshee wasn't just a-" Harry swallowed his words, evidently realizing that finishing that sentence really wasn't likely to calm Draco down.

"And just when were you going to tell me about this?"

"Er..."

"You weren't, were you. And you have the gall to say you don't lie?"

"That wasn't lying, that was just..."

"Lying!"

"I didn't realize you'd be this upset-"

"Oh, no, of course not, why would you? You're skiving off Auror training to go track down pieces of VOLDEMORT'S SOUL, why should I get upset? Why should I worry about you when you're off-"

"You worry about me?"

"Of _course_ I worry, you imbecile!" Draco turned around and stalked into the kitchen, furious with Harry for taking unnecessary risks and with himself for not having the slightest bit of control over whatever sentimental mush came out of his mouth. He accio'd a shot glass and a bottle of icegin, reflecting bitterly that his parents would've been appalled at any Malfoy making a spectacle of himself by turning to drink to deal with a frustrating domestic situation.

The hell with them, he thought angrily as the icegin flowed into the glass with a tinkle of crushed crystals. Neither one of them had had the dubious pleasure of being married to a foolhardy Gryffindor with delusions of heroism, who went traipsing about tracking down dangerous magical objects with two witless companions - well, all right, Granger wasn't quite witless, but still - coupled with the indignity of a hyper-potent Veritaserum potion...

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I won't do it again," Harry said quietly. "I promise, next time I'll come home if anything happens to Ron or Hermione."

Draco glared at him, downing the icegin in one swallow, its strange icy liquid-crystal texture warming his throat as he poured himself another shot, and Harry swallowed nervously.

"Erm, so, about Ron and Hermione. I thought you wouldn't be home, and we had some things to sort out from the last week or so, so... er," he checked his watch. "They should be here any minute."

Draco choked on the crystals and nearly spat them out. "They're coming _here_?"

"... yes?"

"NO! You can't have them here!"

"Draco, calm down. You're never polite to them anyway, you never stifle yourself at all-"

"Are you INSANE?"

"Listen, last time they were here you called Hermione a tiresome pseudo-intellectual and said Ron had the social graces of a troll! That's not what I call stifling yourself."

"It was. With great effort, I might add. D'you have any idea what I actually wanted to say to them?"

Harry grimaced. "God, Draco, I knew you hated my friends but-"

"I don't."

Silence.

"What?" Harry finally asked Draco.

What? Draco asked himself.

"You don't hate them? Then how do you feel about them?"

"They're the two most annoying people I know and I can't stand being near them but I love them because they _usually_ keep you safe and you get to do things you like with them so I don't have to do them with you and oh my god kill me now and please do it quickly."

And now Harry was biting his lip and trying to keep himself from laughing out loud, and Draco wanted to hit his head against the wall repeatedly, and he was going to hunt down Genevieve and strangle her with her own intestines if Floria didn't get to her first. Assuming there was still a Potions class to go to tomorrow, and the Institute Head hadn't fired their teacher with the - admittedly fairly attractive - bouncy tits.

"Are you all right?" Harry said, and his voice was shaking with suppressed mirth.

Draco glared at him. "I have just discovered I love Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. Do you _think_ I'm all right?"

Harry gave up and started laughing. "I'm sorry, it's just-"

"Go AWAY!"

"No, I'm having far too much fun."

"I'm not! Damn you! This is excruciating."

"All right, so you love them. But you still tell them off on a regular basis, and you never care about their feelings. Why be worried about being near them now?"

"Because what I think every single time I'm near them is that Granger is a dried up old harpy far before her time and Weasley is a lovable buffoon and they are going to kill each other before they're thirty, or at the very least go through a messy and ugly divorce. And that'll mean no end of grief for you, which will mean no end of grief for me, not to mention it'll be horrible to watch them both get hurt-" and he was going to die of mortification right about now. "And I don't think anybody wants to hear me say that. Especially right now. You don't need them tearing away at each other, you need them to help you when you go off on your little hero-quests."

"You don't think they're right for each other?" Harry asked curiously.

"Of course not. They're completely wrong. He's no match for her brains, and she could drive a saint to murder. If she'd been the Chosen One, her weapons of choice against the Dark Lord would've been intellectual intimidation and crushing boredom."

Harry tried not to laugh, and Draco rubbed his forehead in frustration.

"Harry, please. I miss you. I wanted to spend time with you, and tell you what I've been doing, and hear what you've been up to, and then I wanted to - god I keep _trying_ to say shag you senseless but instead what's coming out is blither like _cuddle_ with you, stop _laughing_ or you'll be bloody _hell_ I can't even say 'sleeping on the couch tonight' because I know I won't follow through with it but please, just go. Go do what you have to with Weasley and Granger and I'll owl you when the potion wears off. Don't be near me, this is really embarrassing."

Harry was silent for a moment. "Can't I stay, if I promise to be silent? I was looking forward to shagging you senseless too." He smirked. "And, er, cuddling."

Draco sighed. "No. I can't not say what's on my mind. I'm bound to say something that'll kill the mood."

"Oh."

"Please? Go away? For me?" Draco said plaintively, wincing at just how intensely pathetic he sounded.

"All right," Harry finally nodded, and stepped closer to Draco to kiss him goodbye, and they both started as the sound of two people Apparating cracked through the flat.

"Harry?" Granger's voice came from their front hall.

"Oh - I told them to just pop in, you weren't supposed to be here, sorry - Hermione, I'll be right out!"

"Harry?" Weasley's voice called out. "Who are you talking to? Is-"

"Yeah, Draco's here," Harry said quickly. "But we can't stay here, we need to go back to your flat," he said as they exited the kitchen. Weasley opened his mouth and Harry held up his hand and shook his head. "Don't talk to Draco, Potions accident at the Institute."

"Oh. All right." Weasley glanced at Draco curiously. "Why can't-"

"Sh!" Harry said, and Weasley obediently shut his mouth. "All right, we're off, then," Harry said, and kissed Draco chastely on the cheek, murmuring into his ear, "I'll be back for the shagging, though."

"I'll owl you as soon as it wears off."

Harry put his cloak back on and motioned Granger and Weasley towards the door. "Right away?" he said, winking at Draco as they headed out.

"Are you joking? I've been wanking to the thought of you coming home for three days, I think I'm getting a blister on my hand-" Granger's mouth dropped open and Weasley abruptly turned a delicate shade of green, and Draco grinned as he added, unable to resist, "and we're almost out of lube."

Wait a minute. They weren't low on lube. That was a lie.

That probably meant Harry could stay.

... and so could Granger and Weasley.

Draco smiled cheerfully into the frozen silence. "Then again," he said, "maybe that's a good thing, remember I've always wanted to try rimming, and if the lube's all-"

And the last thing he heard as Harry pulled them out the door was Granger's horrified "Oh my god I did _not_ need to know that!"

Draco smirked. He'd have to thank Genevieve tomorrow.


	2. Chapter 2

14

**Very Important Author's Note**

**As explained on the first page, _this page is almost identical to the first page_.**

OK, now, remember, I said I wasn't able to do the challenge. What you see below is not a great work of literature. It is being posted for the sole purpose of answering the question, "So what did you do with those challenges?"

The short answer is: I had fun, learned lots, and did a really crappy job that is not post-worthy in any way shape or form as a story, and should only ever be posted as an illustration of why varying sentence length is a good thing stylistically, aesthetically, and emotionally.

The long answer is: if you don't believe me, look below.

The challenges were:

**1.** Each sentence can have no more and no less then 10 words (and must be grammatically correct). About a third of the story is completely 10-word sentences. **At the note, variable length sentences slowly start to creep in**, until finally by the end they make up about half the text.

**2.** As well as Draco only being able to tell the truth, make Harry only able to tell lies as well. (Have fun with figuring out why he would, lol).

**3.** Somewhere within the story, include a character reading a list.

**ooooooooooo**

**A prophet did once say that honesty's a lonely word**

"Oh my god you're home early," said Draco, absolutely horrified.

Harry hung up his cloak and entered the living room. "All right, that's not exactly the welcome I was expecting." He looked questioningly at Draco, sitting open-mouthed on the couch. "Not that I expected 'Darling, I missed you so much'-"

"Are you going to be leaving soon?" Draco interrupted him.

"I just got here," he said, dropping onto the couch. Draco sprang up and backed away from him with alacrity. "What the - are you not happy to see me?"

"Are you daft – do I look happy?" Draco asked agitatedly.

Harry frowned and stood up, saying "Draco... it's been two-"

Draco shook his head impatiently and went to his desk. "Stop, let me - don't say anything," he said. He started rifling hurriedly through the parchments on his desk.

"Why not?" Harry asked, puzzled, as Draco continued to search.

"Because then I'll have to answer anything you ask and-"

"Why would you have to answer anything I ask you?"

"-because I can't _not_ answer and – Harry, just shut up! Don't say anything, and just - don't ask me anything!" He kept searching, muttering "I know it's in here somewhere..."

"What is?" Harry asked, leaning over his shoulder to look. Startled at Draco's shriek of dismay as Harry touched him.

"Oh, bloody hell, now you've done it!" Draco said, exasperated. He finally located a parchment and shoved it at Harry.

Harry blinked, rather lost, and glanced down at the parchment.

_Magical Institute of Doctoral Education and Research (MIDEAR), Wickhamshire, London._

_Notice of Magical Mishap and/or Adverse Reaction to Magical Activity_

Harry chuckled with relief and shook his head, finally understanding. "Draco, what is this, the third time since you started?"

"Fourth," Draco said, and impatiently signalled Harry to continue reading.

_To the Family/Friends of Potions Master Candidates and Researchers:_

_Description of Incident: Accidental overdose of abnormally potent experimental Veritaserum._

_Effects: Increased talkativeness; Difficulty restraining him/herself from comments; Acute Embarrassment._

_Appropriate Actions: Don't speak to Candidate; Stay away from Candidate_

_If you require more information, please contact the MIDEAR Head_

"That's great," said Harry, and Draco handed him another parchment.

"It gets much better, and yes, that's two incidents today."

_Description of Incident: Unsuccessful attempt to counteract Veritasrum with Fabuloserum._

_Effects: Fabuloserum has not restored Candidate's ability to control speech. However, persons touching affected Candidates become unable to speak truthfully._

"Oh, that's brilliant," said Harry, wincing at his involuntary sarcasm.

_Inability to speak truthfully confined to proximity to Potions Candidates._

_Appropriate Actions: Do not touch Candidate; Stay away from Candidate_

_If you have touched the Candidate, stay away from them. If you must communicate with them, use questions or signs._

_If you require more information, please contact the MIDEAR Head._

"I take it there's a story behind this?" Harry asked.

"We were working on improving Veritaserum potency," Draco said heavily. "Genevieve almost pulled a Longbottom, except her cauldron didn't explode. Her potion boiled over and we all breathed it in. It took about ten minutes Madam Perkins to clear it."

"So did they send your whole Potions class home, then?"

"The whole building was evacuated; you wouldn't believe the mess."

"Why evacuate the whole building because of just one class?"

"Because the blasted stuff spread everywhere, it was just insane. First off Floria told Genevieve she was a brain-dead cow. Then Genevieve called Floria a hysterical bitch, and John agreed-"

"I thought you'd told me John and Floria were dating?"

"_Were_, yes, but something tells me it's pretty much over. Probably Floria telling us John can be a bit... quick. Then the Institute Head came to see what was wrong. Madam Perkins told him to bugger off with all haste. Said he was an interfering dolt, and ugly to boot. Of course, by then he'd breathed a few fumes too. Told Perkins she had nice tits – bouncy, he called them. Said that was the only reason he didn't fire her." Harry started chuckling, and Draco had to smile despite himself. "Perkins told Genevieve she was unlikely to achieve Potions Mastery. Actually, 'about as likely as You-Know-Who being sorted into Hufflepuff.' Then we tried the Fabuloserum, which made things unbelievably worse. Allen touched Floria and told her she made him hard. Floria didn't know whether to be mortally offended or hurt. By then, fights were breaking out all over the building. A stupid Apothecary apprentice hexed the Alchemy Master's nostrils closed. The Laboratories were a mess, the Aurors were called in..." Draco chuckled wryly, saying, "Not that they were much use. And there's a Muggle beauty parlour next door to us. I don't even want to imagine the mess in there."

Harry was laughing helplessly, and Draco scowled at him, unamused.

"This isn't funny, Harry, I didn't think you'd be here. I thought you were coming home tomorrow, like you said-"

"I decided to hell with the mission and came home." Draco laughed at Harry's irritation, half-wondering what had actually happened. Probably nothing important; he'd ask again after this wore off. "So what do you want me to do, keep quiet?"

"No, not good enough, I want you to go away."

"But... but I'm supposed to go training in three days. All the way out in Cardiff, for another five weeks." Harry frowned as his words came out all wrong again.

"It's two days, in Aberdeen, for two weeks, I know." Draco shook his head stubbornly and refused to back down. "And I still don't care, go stay at Weasley's, please."

"All right, if that's what you want – oh for god's-"

Draco rubbed his forehead, trying to stem a looming headache. "I take it that means you don't want to go. Harry... I _can't lie_, so I really, really mean this. I want you to go away and not come back. Not until I send an owl saying it's all right."

"I can see why you'd want me to stay away. Seeing as how you lie to me all the time."

Draco gaped at Harry, his surprise quickly turning to disbelief. "Excuse me, are you saying you don't think I lie?"

"Are you saying you're insulted by that?" Harry asked, puzzled.

"Harry, what colour are all of my ties – oh, bugger! Never mind, you can't talk, this is so _bloody_ annoying. They're green and silver, does that mean anything to you? No, of course not, brains have never been your forte."

Harry's eyes narrowed, but he smirked at Draco's sudden dismay. Well, that... really had been rather tactless, all things considered.

"Bugger... I'm sorry, I didn't - Harry, just please go away."

Harry just tilted his head and crossed his arms stubbornly.

"You're being thicker than usual," Draco said, and winced slightly. "I can't lie or shut up, and you lie compulsively. _Please_ tell me you can see how this is dangerous."

Harry stared at Draco stubbornly, silently refusing to back down.

"What are we supposed to do if we can't talk?"

Harry raised one eyebrow suggestively, and grinned at Draco's reaction. Draco narrowed his eyes, squelching his sudden, completely inappropriate arousal.

"You think neither of us'll say or do something awkward? Something likely to bring the mood to a crashing halt?"

Harry smiled, shrugging as if to say he didn't care.

"You're being extremely thick-headed, even for you, you know. And I can't stop myself saying whatever's on my mind. That's not charmingly romantic, it's just a recipe for disaster."

Harry's eyes glinted with amusement, and he slowly came closer. Draco blew out his breath in frustration, backing up quickly. "No, come on, Harry, just get out, go to Weasley's."

"Are you sure you want me to?" Harry asked, frowning.

"Oh for Merlin's - I _really_ can't lie, you nitwit! If I say I want you gone, I mean it! You're usually so gullible it's painful, but how bloody typical. Now, when I'm under ultra-Veritaserum, you suddenly become a skeptic."

"Hang on, do you really think I'm all that gullible?"

"I could say I love Hippogriffs and you'd believe me. It's pathetic, actually; makes it not even worth the effort."

"Why, do you lie to me on a regular basis?"

"All the time," Draco said promptly, and Harry's eyebrows rose. "Everybody does it, including you - it's just how people-"

"I lie to you too!" Harry said, then looked annoyed.

"Yes, actually, you do – everybody does, it's just basic courtesy. I'm not talking about affairs, or betraying you to Voldemort. I'm talking about small lies we all say, every day. In order to get along with the people around us. 'That's a lovely tie', or 'I like dinner burned black'."

"Draco, since when have you ever bothered to be courteous?"

"I _am_ courteous, and by the way, so are you. Don't tell me you're actually interested in Weasley's chess stories. Or in Granger's dissertations on 1001 uses for fairy tears."

**end of exclusively ten-word sentences**

Harry looked sheepish.

"Obviously you're not, but you don't ever tell them so. It's just part of how you stay friends with them."

"Look, I'd really love to keep arguing about this, honestly. But I'd like to leave as soon as possible – bugger!" Draco waved him on impatiently. "I've only got a week home before going to Cardiff. I'd like to be as far from you as possible."

"Merlin, I'm getting dizzy trying to understand what you're saying."

"Do you think a silence spell on you would help?"

"We tried that at the Institute; didn't work at all."

"So I'll do it on you instead - no, bugger. Erm... why don't I just do the spell on myself?"

"_No_, I said... and don't look at me like that..."

Harry tilted his head rather appealingly, and Draco's resolve faltered.

Damn it... it had been a very long two weeks. And it would be even longer before Harry came back. And he'd been so looking forward to having Harry home. Their flat was peaceful and orderly without Harry's rubbish everywhere. And without his various friends traipsing in and out constantly. But life was so much better when Harry was home. To talk with, spend time with, go to bed with...

No no no no, not the big green eyes thing.

"Can I do the spell?" Harry said, his voice low. And soft, the way he knew always got to Draco...

Damn... Draco finally nodded, feeling like ten kinds of idiot. But... missing what little time they had, for fear of embarrassment...

Then Harry kissed him, and Draco smiled despite himself. Ah, yes, how could he have almost forgotten about this. Harry in their flat also meant sex - lots of sex. The "no talking" thing could make things interesting there, too.

He smiled as Harry's pulse quickened and his hands slid into Draco's hair, and then their tongues and lips were caressing each other. He pulled Harry closer, delicious warmth slowly spreading through him. Feeling Harry's excitement rise, feeling his own pulse speeding up. Yes, very nice, they started to move into the bedroom-

"Oh, hell," Harry said suddenly, and stopped, drawing back slightly.

"What?"

Harry stared at Draco, nervous and a little exasperated, and Draco could almost see the gears working away inside, trying to figure out how to get important information across.

"You have something vitally important you need to tell me?"

"No."

"Er... can it wait until whenever the potion wears off?"

Harry grimaced at his watch, and Draco rolled his eyes.

"All right, I'm assuming that means this is time-sensitive information?"

"Can't I write-"

"The potion makes almost any communication except facial expressions uncontrollable."

Harry sighed.

"All right, go ahead, I'll try to piece it together."

"All right, erm," Harry cleared his throat and Draco reflected that it probably felt incredibly bizarre, not knowing what would come out of your mouth. At least in his case, while he couldn't control what he said, it made a certain amount of sense. "I've been with Ron and Hermione for two weeks, but-"

"What?" Draco frowned. "You were _supposed_ to be with them; where were they?"

"With me the whole time."

"You were alone?"

"No, never."

"You said you were going to travel with them both! You mean this whole time you've been on your own? For two weeks, hunting down bloody Horcruxes with no back-up-"

"No, I was perfectly safe!" Harry blurted quickly, then blushed.

"Oh god, you were alone and in danger, weren't you? What happened, were you attacked?"

Harry nodded and Draco let out his breath with relief. "All right, you weren't attacked... were Weasley or Granger attacked?"

"It wasn't Ron," Harry said, and Draco rolled his eyes.

"Weasley, then. What a shock. What was it?"

"Not a banshee," said Harry, and Draco's eyebrows shot up.

"Good god, what were you doing near a banshee lair?"

"Nothing dangerous," Harry said quickly, and blanched at Draco's scowl.

"Something so un-dangerous that Weasley got put out of commission."

"No."

"Oh, marvellous, that's supposed to make me feel much better. Bad enough you're out being a typical Gryffindor brainless oaf! Blundering about among Death Eaters and banshees and who knows-"

"I was perfectly safe!"

"You were _by yourself_! You _said_ you would be travelling with Granger and Weasley! What's the bloody use of having them around if they're going to just flit off the moment there's a spot of danger-"

"Listen, that banshee was-" Harry swallowed his words, evidently realizing that no matter what he said, and how the Fabuloserum twisted it, it wouldn't help.

"Just when were you going to tell me about this?"

"As soon as I saw you," Harry began, then stopped.

"You weren't, were you. And you say you don't lie?"

"How was I supposed to know you'd get this upset?"

"You're skipping Auror training to hunt pieces of VOLDEMORT'S SOUL! So what possible reason would I have to get upset? Why should I worry about you when you go off-"

"Wait – you worry about me?"

"Of _course_ I worry, you utter imbecile!" Draco snapped furiously. He stalked into the kitchen, furious with Harry for taking unnecessary risks and with himself for not having the slightest bit of control over whatever sentimental mush came out of his mouth. He accio'd a shot glass and a bottle of icegin. Reflected bitterly that his parents would've been appalled at any Malfoy making a spectacle of himself by turning to drink to deal with a frustrating domestic situation.

Sod them, he thought angrily, pouring icegin into his glass. Neither one of them had had the dubious pleasure of being married to a foolhardy Gryffindor with delusions of heroism, who went traipsing about tracking down dangerous magical objects with two witless companions - well, all right, Granger wasn't quite witless, but still. Never mind the indignity of a hyper-potent Veritaserum potion overdose...

"Draco-"

"Shut up!" Draco said, furious.

"Look, I-"

"No, shut up! This isn't any fucking good. I don't want you around when I've no control over-"

"Draco, I swear I won't bloody well do it again!" Harry said, exasperated. "I'll come home if anything happens to Ron or Hermione."

Draco glared at him, and Harry stopped and swallowed, hard.

"You forgot about the potion. You tried to say that for real. Except it's a lie, and you know it."

Harry looked away.

"You're putting yourself in danger. You know I'll be pissed, but you're too thick to realise it's because I worry about you. And your first impulse is to _lie_ and try to promise me you'll be careful, which you have no intention of doing. Are you getting any kind of idea now about why it would have been a much better plan for you to GO AWAY!"

Harry sat down and put his head in his hands.

"You miserable bastard. Bad enough I have to worry about you, you don't-" Draco turned on his heel and started to walk away. Then a burst of fury made him abruptly turn back. "No! I'm not running away from this! You wanted to stay, so here's a few hard truths!" He stalked back to where Harry was sitting.

"Listen, I left _everything_ behind to be here with you. And I don't want your guilt or your bloody gratitude. But I do want you to not throw away everything just because you can't be arsed to take the simplest precautions. It's charming that you're a big hero, but your big heroics will leave me widowed and without any bloody family, because they're all gone, and I haven't got anybody else. And I don't want to be the Boy Who Mourned, I looked washed out in all-black." He stopped, appalled at the tremor creeping into his voice, and made himself take a deep breath before continuing. "I know you're the saviour of the world, and you need to make great sacrifices for the cause. But for once it would be really spiffing if you were willing to sacrifice for _me_. I don't even want you to not be a hero – I just want you to be a hero who uses what little brains God gave you to best advantage. I want you to realize _I'll_ be left alone otherwise. Is that enough honesty for you!"

"No," Harry said softly.

Draco glared at him, downing the icegin in one swallow. Its liquid-crystal ice warmed his throat as he poured another. Harry opened his mouth nervously and Draco shook his head.

"I don't feel like deciphering your lying gibberish right now."

Harry came closer and hesitantly took Draco's hand, and Draco twitched away from him irately, still somewhat shaken. God, this was... he didn't want this crap. He hadn't wanted to admit all of this. The worry that he lived with, every time Harry went away, the worry that he was going to be left alone and that it mattered a hell of a lot more than he wanted it to.

He cleared his throat, trying to get his composure back. "What was it you wanted to tell me?" he asked. "I take it it had something about Granger and Weasley?"

"No."

"That would be a yes, then. So, you weren't with them. You were risking your life and they were doing what? Sunbathing in Torre Molinos?"

"Yes."

"Was Weasley injured?"

"No."

"Right, so Weasley was injured, I assume not too badly. Otherwise you'd've said so as soon as you got home."

"No."

"I don't even know what that was in answer to. I've no way of knowing what you just lied about. It's worse than trying to understand Trelawney in her cups."

Harry sighed.

"Right. You needed me to know something about Granger and Weasley. They're getting married?"

"Yes."

"Never mind, stupid question, you know I couldn't care less. All right, something to do with me. They're coming here," he joked, and knocked back another shot of icegin.

"No."

Draco choked on the tiny crystals, nearly spitting them out. "What? I was joking! They're coming _here_? When?" Harry looked at his watch and Draco swore rather creatively. "No."

"No?"

"NO! You can't have them here!"

"Draco, I know you care about their feelings and love them dearly-" Harry began, and started to chuckle at his own words despite the seriousness of the situation.

"I do."

There was a long silence as they stared at each other.

"What?" Harry finally asked, as Draco asked himself the same thing.

"You do what?"

"Care about them," Draco said, much to his own bewilderment. Scratch that earlier thought about at least knowing that what came out of his own mouth would make sense.

"What?"

"They're without a doubt the most annoying people I know and I can't stand being near them, but I love them. Because they _usually_ keep you safe and you get to do things you like with them so I don't have to do them with you and oh my god kill me now and please do it quickly."

Harry was biting his lip to keep himself from laughing. And Draco wanted to hit his head against the wall repeatedly, and he was going to hunt down Genevieve and strangle her with her own intestines if Floria didn't get to her first. Assuming there was still a Potions class to go to tomorrow, and the Institute Head hadn't fired their teacher with the - admittedly fairly attractive - bouncy tits.

"You all right?" Harry said, voice shaking with suppressed mirth.

Draco glared at him. "I've just discovered I love Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. Do you _think_ I'm all right?"

Harry gave up and started laughing.

"Go AWAY!"

"Yes, right away-"

"I'm not joking! Damn you! This is excruciating."

"All right, so you hate them," Harry said. "But you're so kind and sensitive near them most of the time. Why be worried about being near them now?"

"Because what I think every single time I'm near them is that Granger is a dried up old harpy far before her time and Weasley is a lovable buffoon and they are going to kill each other before they're thirty, or at the very least go through a messy and ugly divorce. And that'll mean no end of grief for you, which will mean no end of grief for me, not to mention it'll be horrible to watch them both get hurt-" and he was going to die of mortification right about now. "I don't think anybody wants to hear me say that. Especially right now. You don't need them tearing away at each other, you need them to help you when you go off on your little hero-quests."

"You don't think they're right for each other?" Harry asked curiously.

"Of course not. They're completely wrong. He's no match for her brains, and she could drive a saint to murder. If she'd been the Chosen One, her weapons of choice against the Dark Lord would've been intellectual intimidation and crushing boredom."

Harry tried not to laugh, and Draco sighed in frustration.

"Harry, please. I miss you. I wanted to spend time with you, and tell you what I've been doing, and hear what you've been up to, and then I wanted to - god I keep _trying_ to say shag you senseless but instead what's coming out is blither like _cuddle_ with you, stop _laughing_ or you'll be bloody _hell_ I can't even say 'sleeping on the couch tonight' because I know I won't follow through with it but please, just go. Go do what you have to with Weasley and Granger and I'll owl you when the potion wears off. Don't be near me, this is really embarrassing."

Harry was silent for a moment. "Can't I stay, if I promise to not say anything? I was really dreading shagging you senseless too." He smirked. "And, er, cuddling."

Draco sighed. "No. I can't not say what's on my mind. I'm bound to say something that'll kill the mood." He took a deep breath. "Please? Go away? For me?" Draco winced to hear just how intensely pathetic he sounded.

Harry finally nodded and came closer to kiss Draco goodbye. They both started as two pops of Apparition cracked loudly.

"Harry?" Granger's voice came from their front hall.

"Oh that's wonderful, I'm so glad they're here," Harry said. "Erm, Hermione, Draco has something he wants to tell you-" Draco clapped a hand over Harry's mouth.

"Harry?" Weasley called out. "Who are you talking to? Is-"

"I'm here," Draco said, signalling to Harry to stay quiet. "You can't stay here, you need to go back to your flat," he said as they exited the kitchen. Weasley opened his mouth and Harry held up his hand and shook his head. "Don't say anything, Potions accident at the Institute, Harry'll be all right as soon as he's out of contact with me... erm, I think. Here," he grabbed the parchment from the Institute and shoved it at Weasley. "It should wear off once you're out of here."

"Erm, all right," Weasley said, but glanced at Draco curiously. "Why can't-"

Harry kissed Draco chastely on the cheek, murmuring into his ear, "D'you still want me to come back for that shagging?"

"I'll owl you as soon as the potion wears off."

Harry put his cloak back on and motioned Granger and Weasley towards the door. "Right away?" he said, winking at Draco as they headed out.

"Are you joking? I've been wanking to the thought of you coming home for three days, I think I'm getting a blister on my hand-" Granger's mouth dropped open and Weasley abruptly turned a delicate shade of Granger, and Draco grinned as he added, unable to resist, "and we're almost out of lube."

Wait a minute, they weren't low on lube at all. That was a lie... which probably meant Harry could stay.

...which most probably also meant Granger and Weasley could too.

Draco smiled into the frozen silence of the other three. "Then again," he said, "that might be a good thing. I've always wanted to try rimming, and if the lube's-"

And the last thing he heard as Harry pulled them out the door was Granger's horrified "Oh my god I did _not_ need to know that!"

Draco smirked and shut the door, thinking of thanking Genevieve tomorrow.


End file.
